As a twentysomething female, I'm very conscious of how people in the workplace view me.  I fear being taken advantage of because of my age, race, or gender.  I know all about the gender wage gap, how women are penalized in their careers if they decide to start a family, and how women get overlooked for promotions.
 
I notice the little comments people make.  For example, a manager from another team noticed my coworker and I had worn skirts to work.  He made the comment, "It's so nice to see you girls dressed up at work.  You don't see that often anymore."  At my old job, I had a disagreement with one of my internal clients who refused to listen to my advise despite my technical expertise, and one of the managers told me I "needed to smile."  My previous boss often asked me to plan luncheons when division managers came to visit our plant.  "It's a good experience that will gain you exposure in the company," he claimed, yet followed with, "You won't actually be able to attend the meetings."  (The last time he pulled this, I politely declined and handed him my two week notice a few days later.)
 
Why is it that females receive feedback to dress pretty, look pleasant, and make sure everyone is served good food?  I doubt any of these comments were meant to be offensive, but here are a few things all of these experiences have in common – all comments were made by male managers and these same managers would never say these things to a young man who worked for them.  My conclusion is that these male managers saw me not as the intelligent young employee I was, but as a girl, the newest four-letter word in business.
 
Here's a word association exercise:  Get a sheet of paper and draw and create a table with three columns.  Label the second column "girl" and the third column "woman."  Now, put these five characteristics in the first column (one on each line) and fill in the table for which characteristics work for a "girl" and which work for a "woman."  Feel free to add any other characteristics you see fit, or leave out any of the ones I have listed.
 
Age – any age or age range
Marital status – single, married, divorced, etc
Highest Education level – high school, undergrad, grad school, phD, etc
Career level – no career, assistant, entry-level analyst, middle-tier manager, executive, or any other title
Assets – owns/does not own a House/condo, Car, Stocks/Investments, or any other asset
 
When finished, consider these questions: What connotation does the word "woman" have vs. "girl?"  Which would you prefer to be seen as?  (Feel free to leave your answers in the comments section.)
 
It's not fair that women, especially young women, are treated like girls at the workplace, but it's a reality we have to face if we want to be serious players.  The title of "woman" seems to be something you have to earn, and the only way to do it is change how you carry yourself.  Before I graduated from college I read the book, Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office by Lois Frankel.  There are many books out that coach women on workplace gender issues, but this is a personal favorite.  In the book, I learned how to be confident with my opinions, use strong tone of voice and wording when speaking, and stop other "girly" habits that undermined my credibility.  It is a must-read for any woman who feels that she is being treated as a girl instead of a woman at the office.
 
Remember, even when you do all the right things, there are still people who will see and treat you like a girl rather than a woman.  This is especially detrimental to your career if the person is your direct boss.  There's nothing you can do to change people, but you can change you and your situation.  Know when it's time to change jobs or find a new boss who gives you the respect you deserve.  Look to other women in your field for confidence, support, and mentorship.  After all, your career and future is at stake.
 
As I mentioned earlier, I'd love to hear your thoughts on when a girl becomes a woman in the comments section.  Answers to the exercise, stories from your own experience, and constructive criticism of this article are especially welcomed.  I'll be posting my own answers to the exercise above once people have had the chance to consider the question themselves.  There are no wrong answers, and it should be interesting to see how we as women see ourselves and each other.